Priority For Whom First Wife OR Mother?

Priority wife or mother
Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,
As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh.  (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)

One of our brothers/sisters has asked this question:
Assalamualaykum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh.
" In laws parents husband rights"
On the same topic please give me some direction  : Whose request takes priority your wife's request or your mothers knowing that you are going to hurt one of them .
Please get back to me.

(There may be some grammatical and spelling errors in the above statement. The forum does not change anything from questions, comments and statements received from our readers for circulation in confidentiality.)


Priority wife or mother
In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is no one (no idol, no person, no grave, no prophet, no imam, no dai, nobody!) worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad(saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.

Islam guides the believers to strike a balance in giving the due person their due rights without compromising the rights of the other. The mother should be given her due rights without compromising the rights due to the wife; and the wife should be given her due rights without compromising the rights due to ones mother.

If the wife asks that the husband spend all his time and money on her and ignore his mother; then that would obviously not be correct! Or if the mother demands that her son spend all his time and money on her and ignore his wife and children, that too would not be correct! The husband has to strike a balance in giving each person their due rights.

But if there comes an unlikely situation, where fulfilling the request of one would hurt the other; then the preference should definitely be given to the request of the mother, provided it is within the boundaries of Islam.

Al-Tirmidhi Hadith 4928 Narrated by Abud Darda
When a man came to him and said, "I have a wife whom my mother commands me to divorce," he replied to him that he had heard Allah's Messenger (saws) say, "A parent is the best of the gates of Paradise; so if you wish, keep to the gate, or lose it."

Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allahs Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.

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